To Rant Again

Been a long time since I had a good rant. I feel like I need one, so here it goes.

Things I resent:

- People who get drunk/do drugs/sleep around somehow feeling like they get to define the word "party." What you do is not a "party." It is a life-long regret waiting to happen. My parties never cause guilt, remorse, hangovers, or liver failure. They are just fun. So I win. You lose. Now give me and my people back the term "party" and you can start using the real title for what you do: serial stupidity.

- Political extremists on both sides posturing as if passion for a cause equates to intelligence, treating others who are less vehement or who disagree with them as not simply having a difference of opinion, but rather having some form of pervasive mental retardation. News flash to the radicals - we don't agree with you because WE THINK YOU ARE WRONG. The key word there being THINK. We have thought our positions through just as much as you have, and came to a different conclusion. This means, by necessity, that whatever probability there is for us being incorrect or misguided, the very same probability exists for you. So come down off your ivory towers of delusion and play in the sandbox with the rest of us. Yacking away up there just makes you look pedantic and silly. Or stay up there and look pedantic and silly. Your call. Either way, you look silly.

- People who claim the world was a so-much-better-place at some vague, undefined point in the past. The "good old days" are like Bigfoot. Everyone knows about it, but nobody has any evidence that it actually existed. Every major indicator: health, life-span, quality of living, liberty, independence, wealth, education, equality, you name it, does not get better when you look back in time. People who pine for the good old days are suffering from selective memory delusions. They are remembering only the good things, and forgetting all the bad. Like complaining that people are "out-of-touch" nowadays, while simultaneously Facebook chatting with a friend they have not thought about in decades. The old days are just old. Not good. If they were good, we wouldn't have moved away from them. Oxygen is very old, but we still use it. Ergo: oxygen is good. Indentured servitude is also old, but we don't use it anymore. Ergo: not good. It is easy math. Automobiles = good, leaded gasoline = bad. Telephones = good, telegraph = bad. French fries = good, French military prowess = bad. See how that works?

- The American media during election cycles, who eagerly report on how vile, hateful or negative the campaigns are while simultaneously accepting money from those campaigns to run the negative ads. Either you support it or you don't. If you don't like it, don't let it buy your dinner. Conversely, if you do let it buy your dinner, this implies some form of consent. It is like dating. Girls who don't like me usually don't let me buy them dinner. The TV networks are like that girl I dated once who was all too happy to let me buy her dinner, but meanwhile told everyone else she talked to that she didn't like me. The moral of the story - I only bought her dinner once. I wish our media, specifically the networks, would pick a side and stick with it. Stop pretending to bite the hand that you are so eagerly eating from.

- Democrats

- Republicans

- The idea that those two choices are somehow all that there is, and that we should be satisfied with it. Ever go to a restaurant that had only two items on the menu? Didn't think so. Ever been presented with a list of 5 options and been so overwhelmed by the variety that your brain melted? Didn't think so either. The political parties in this country are blatantly insulting our intelligence by telling us we have to chose from Tweedle-Dumb and Tweedle-Worse every election. But we keep drinking the cool-aid, so they will keep serving it up.

Aaaaaaaaaand I'm spent. For now. That is all, carry on.