Ouch!

So, the U got beat up last night, and for more than half of the team that is a literal statement. We were playing a good game until the 2nd quarter, when starting running-back Asiata went down with a broken lower leg. I was watching it at a buddys house, and he has TVo, so we replayed the injury to see what really happened. Gnarly. His right leg got bent out at least 30 degrees to the right. Clearly a break, likely both bones. Not quite Theisman-esque, but close. Made four grown men shiver and go 'EEEeeeewww!'

As if that weren't bad enough, we lost Johnson shortly afterwards to a separated shoulder. The guy gets smashed to the ground, gets up holding at his shoulder, walks over to the sidelines pointing at his shoulder, and what does Andy Ludwig do? CALLS A PASS PLAY! Well, as any vertebrate could predict, Johnson throws the pass (a good one, and a completion) and from that point on, cannot use his arm. Good call, coach Ludwig. You are a simpering moron. And that brings me to my first

Gripe O' the Day: Coach Ludwig and the Magical Mystery tour. Why, please tell me why, you have to try the speed wrap around play over and over again against a team that is faster and larger than yours? What is Ludwig thinking? 'Well, gee. That worked like crap. . . Hmm. Hey! Lets run the same crap again! They will never see that coming.' Or there is this stroke of genius:

The whole first half of the game, when we still had our roster intact, I was screaming that they needed to run quick routs to put a lid on the blitz and open up the run. Finally, FINALLY, Ludwig runs four recievers on quick routs and what happens? U of U touchdown. Normally I would not complain about this, but my gripe is that it never happened again. He started calling 9 yard sits with 12 yards to go. I mean, Football is a complicated game, but it is not rocket science. If you need 12 yards, and you only move the reciever 9 yards downfield, you HAVE NOT THOUGHT THINGS THROUGH. Anyone out there capable of telling me how many yards our team still needs? If so, you are smarter than good old Andy. Ludwig proves, time and time again, that he is not even qualified to be a kindergarten math teacher, let alone the OC for a D-1 team. Please, coach Whitt, fire this guy. Yeah, your offense got banged up. Key players were taken from the game. Sure. But this kind of insane (as in, doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results) play calling is killing the program. I honestly feel like any U victory is a victory over and in spite of Andy Ludwig. He is killing us.

Gripe O' the Day #2: UTA TRAX drivers. These guys seem to all be anti-social sadists. I ran full bore down a steep hill and across a busy street wearing a suit and carrying a briefcase to catch a train just as it pulled up. Huffing and puffing, I reached my finger out to push the little illuminated green button to open the doors. Just before I push the button, it goes dark. I stand there, a little confused. The doors are not opening. I push the button again. Then yet again. No door-opening-action whatsoever. I look up at the driver, who is maybe ten feet from me, and I see his face clearly in the rear-view mirror. He is looking at me. He sits there for another ten seconds (no kidding) and then he PULLS AWAY! What a jerk. It would have cost him nothing to open the doors for me. I would not have made the slightest noticable difference to his punctuality. But no, TRAX drivers do not care about their passengers, it seems. They care about their schedule. What a crock. To the TRAX driver who pulled away without me: even in your closed in box where you talk to no other human being the whole day you managed to insult me. Your work is complete. Job well done.

GOOOOO UTES!!!

Today is opening day for University of Utah Football. My wife and I are huge fans of the U, but particularly of U of U football. the game is away, at Oregon State, so we are going to a buddy's house to watch on his big-screen. I am so pumped for the season to start. It has been too long. Go Utes!

This heat has GOT TO GO!

I am done with summer. Heat has got to go. I want cool nights, warm days, and some lounging in my hammock. I want camping on long weekends, hiking through the fall colors, and watching football. OK, so I would take the football no matter what the temperature, but this heat is seriously getting to me. Heat makes me grumpy. Grumpy makes me want to. . .

Gripe o' the Day: E-surance commercials. Are you kidding me? Its like with each successive commercial, they fire the dumb guy from before and hire someone stupider. At first the dumb chick was a spy (being pursued by the Three Stooges), but now they have her fighting giant monsters? Give me a break. And why do we have to suffer through their horrible graphics and pathetic writing? I hate them. I will never, ever, ever buy E-surance specifically because of their advertising. Their ads are insulting. I mean, some insurance ad campaigns are great. I love the Geiko gecko, and the Allstate ones aren't bad either. E-surance is clearly the bottom of the barrel, the dregs of insurance advertising. I feel like suing them for emotional damages, and for ruining my TV.

OK, that's all for now. Going to the Utes game tonight. Well, not really, since they are playing Oregon State in Oregon, but I am going to a party to watch the game. GO UTES!!!!

Setting Sail

I like to believe, though I cannot prove, that I am a descendant of John Roberts, aka Bertholomew Roberts, aka Black Bart, aka The Dread Pirate Roberts. Plus, I think the name is catchy, and I like to wear masks (they are terribly comfortable).

This blog is my happy place, where I go to vent and wax grandiose. It is neither intended to be serious nor insightful. Should insight or seriousness happen, contact your physician. If you are a physician, contact yourself.

Gripe O' the Day: Dumb guy on Trax who did not think he could go to Temple Square to see the lights because he is "Christian." - - Sir, I am a Mormon, and I would have no problem visiting the Vatican, the Wailing Wall, or even Meccah if they let me. I can visit those places because I respect the people for whom those places are sacred. I think that you avoid Temple Square, not because you are a Christian, but because you are a closed-minded bigot. Or maybe because the sister missionaries scare you. Whatever the reason, your avoidance of Temple Square is a farce. You are avoiding Mormons, and do not want to be associated with Mormons. In other words, you are prejudiced, and do not respect the people for whom Temple Square is a holy place. The problem then, is neither with the Mormons or with Temple Square, but rather with you, yourself.